Shut it off!

I am really kind of scared about what the next three months are going to be.

I cannot, cannot, cannot be my mother's therapist. And yet I'm the only person around, and so it's falling on me.

I am completely and utterly the wrong person. I can cope with this objectively. I can't cope with it when you tell me every single detail of how fucking terrible you feel and how awful my father is UGH. I want to scream. I am SO incredibly fucking angry but there's nothing I can do about it. It's misplaced rage that can't be released, ever, because I can't hurt you anymore than you're already hurt.

This is so fucking unfair. I feel like everything in my life is conspiring to ruin my happiness. What the fuck?! Finally I'm intrinsically, actually happy, and finally I feel at peace, and that's when everyone else in my life decides to try to make me as fucking miserable as they possibly can.

I'm okay. Sigh.